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Before I was Me
Been thinking about a tattoo I’d get written across my body for when my mind finally gives way. My mind going is about the only thing I’m truly frightened of…
Before I was me…
I used to be fit, and even quite smart -
We’d chat about love, history, sports, and arts:
And I could run, run like the wind,
And had a pretty good voice, just loved to sing.
But now I am me -
Not much more than a shell,
My body doesn’t work,
And my brain’s no longer well.
And if parts of me live, Well, I’ll never know;
Probably get angry at you, For the confusion I hold;
So now this is me, please forgive my imposure,
But somewhere in here, I’m seeking closure.
Before I was me…
I was sharp as a tack, I’d help your spirit soar
Lift you up when times were bleak,
Always believed that you could be more.
I had your back, but now on mine,
Is who I once was, way back in time;
A time I loved, a time I’d been broken;
Being friends with you, would be no mere token.
So as you wash me down, know my vacant eyes
Once looked at wonder at the birds in the skies
And dew drops on leaves and babies first steps,
And friends long buried, and many regrets,
And more pain than I wanted, and more joy than I deserved;
Those memories my mind, no longer preserves.
Before I was me…
When I loved I was all in, it only happened twice:
One never got started, one becoming my wife;
And though loyalty tested nearly cost me my life;
but I took one more step after my heart had been diced.
Unlike many, I had food on my plate,
And air I could breathe, and a roof over my head,
And though I cannot explain to you;
Know I now wish I was dead,
And a chance to…
